I arrived home with the car late.I saw 'herself' pulling back the curtains as I came up the drive.The car was not well received.She was a convent educated girl,gorgeous actually, but when she was upset her sentences were punctuated with quite foul language,but because she had a nice accent it somehow didn't seem too offensive.I had an integral garage and she knew that when it started the new baby would wake.She was right.In fact whenever I went out she would stand fingers in ears as though her ear drums were bursting .To placate her I bought her a lovely 1969 E Type 4.2.Dark blue with grey leather.Gorgeous to look at,hideous to drive as all E types are.In August I suggested a weekend away .

'Would you like to go to Ormskirk'
'Wheres that?'
'Lancashire'
'Wheres that?'
'Up north'

Stoney silence.

'Can we go in the XKE?'
'No'
'Why'....can you feel her enthusiasm?

Anyway I got my way.Luckily she didn't ask why Ormskirk.Stephen Pilkington (see previous) had a Boxer for sale.Part of the deal was she chose the music for the trip on the 8 track..This was the sound system before cassette...about half the size of the current VHS tape.Anyway 3 hours of The Carpenters isn't always fun. Got there,adored the Boxer.She sat in the Daytona fast asleep.Chatted to a chap there called Dave who was visiting in his Corvette.I said to Stephen I would call the following Summer,maybe we could deal.( We did )Stayed over night.Lake district..etc.Later I found out Dave was Dave Stewart from the Eurithmics.Nice chap..strange hair.We had to be back in Hedingham for Sunday lunch.I said I missed the baby, how fast could I go.
'You're driving the F****** thing'

I took that as she was happy.
Bright morning ,not a soul about.On the dash of the Daytona the revcouter is on the passenger side.On the Journey up she regularly asked the speed.The revcounter went up to 7000 then went orange then red.She thought it was the speedo.On the M6 as usual she went to sleep,after all we had been up over an hour.I had 7000rpm in 5th..close to 180mph.It was noisy.She woke up.Looked across..'What F****** speed is this''I pointed to the revcounter aka speedo.Look 70mph.The penny dropped.'You're a f****** liar'.She undid her belts and started to open her door.The brakes on the Daytona were tested that day.The remaining 2.5 hours were silent.A mile from home.her asleep,me happy..doing 20mph a huge bang from the back.'What the f*** was that' almost in her sleep.Got out, the rear wheel had cracked in half all the way round the rim.On later inspection 70% of the crack was old!There but for the grace of God go I.....My troubles hadn't ended.As she felt aggrieved over the high speed(She never knew about the rim failure..I said it was a puncture) I was instructed to take her to Colchester and buy a fur coat.The thing was I loved her and it meant a quiet life.

I'm seeing her again Dec 6.Our son's wedding.Should be fun.They say she has mellowed...I think that would be a shame.I love fiesty women.

Hope you enjoyed the story ..I've told it a million times.Even she laughs now.It must be her new Merc!

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